“The embracing of grief makes me so aware of the preciousness of life. While I see darkness in my grief, to heal I must seek out light. I will discover that life and living are scared, beautiful gifts to be treasured each and every moment.”
We have just completed a grief support group and I am always amazed after meeting these wonderful people, at the strength of the human spirit.
When one speaks of grief, it is natural that we think of death….however; grief comes in the form of many losses that one faces in a lifetime. Here are some things we can learn from grief:
The Value of Time – There is sweet beauty about life that we all try to grasp and hold on to, a sweet innocence and we reach as far back as we can to hold on to it.
The Need for Simplicity – Only after we have something taken from us do we realize its true value. Most of the time we are so busy taking care of the details of living, we overlook the small wonders that pass through our lives.
The Benefits of Change – Without change, we wither and die. When we hold on to things (jobs, people, stuff, etc.) that do not bring us joy, we may lose the opportunity of doing what we are really called to do.
The Value of Patience – How frustrated we become when we must wait for something to happen. We want control over our world. Grief teaches us that life can’t be hurried if we expect to get the best out of it.
The Pleasure of Laughter – We often feel disloyal if we find happiness and laughter in the midst of grief. This can be the exact medicine that prescriptions cannot fill. Laughter is the music of our souls.
The Need to Belong – We all need to belong to someone or something. Our sense of belonging to the human race and our recognition of the importance of our kinships to each other enhance our quality of life. Grief teaches us we must have each other to survive.
The Value of Sharing – One of grief’s lessons is the importance of being open, of candidly sharing our thoughts and feelings. There is magic in sharing ourselves with someone else.
The Need to Expand our Family of Choice – As we get older we find ourselves in an ever diminishing circle of family and friends. This happens particularly after our children are grown. We move, lose friends and family, we realize the importance of reaching out and gathering in family members of our own choice.
The Worth of Relationships – There is a lot of talk about the risk involved in loving. For everyone who loves there are risks to forming a connection with another person, suffering is guaranteed. But only when we love will we find a fullness of life and a personal experience of tremendous satisfaction. We become more curious, better risk takers, hopefully, we become more compassionate, more grateful, more loving and experience spiritual growth. During grief one may feel that they were spiritually deserted, rejected and lost. The difficult times of grief will show us that we are no longer the same person we were and we are pulled inward to search for our connectedness to God. Once we feel this connectedness return to our heart, we know that we are finally at peace with our souls and hold the gift of serenity at last. This, by far, is the most valuable grief gift that we receive.
We are given a choice of two roads to journey when grief comes into our life. My prayer is that the road you take will lead you to peace and joy and may God hold you gently in the palm of his hand.